As Tim and I have been walking this road since we received Charlotte’s diagnosis in February we have really been seeking the Lord and asking Him to show us His plan in all of this. We have never doubted He had a plan – a leaf doesn’t fall from a tree without God allowing it. And we know that for many this brings many questions about why God would allow this to happen. We know that He allowed it for many reasons – to bring glory to Himself, to grow my faith and Tim’s faith and the faith of our friends and family. I have already been thinking about how I will use this journey in my own ministry in the future.
But God recently reminded me that while this is part of my story and Tim’s story and even Sam’s story, this is really Charlotte’s story. She is the one who already bears the physical scars. She is the one who has to endure the pain of surgery and recovery.
There is certainly pain for Tim and me (and for others who love us and our babies). And there is pain for Sam in being separated from us. There will certainly be more in the future with the subsequent surgeries. And God will, in time, reveal to each of us the purpose for the pain. But I have to be content with knowing that I may never know the full extent of His reasons, at least as far as Charlotte is concerned. You see, it’s her story.
In Book 3 of The Chronicles of Narnia series, entitled The Horse and His Boy, there is a scene that beautifully illustrates this point. The boy, Shasta, and his friend Aravis, had been riding when Aravis was attacked by a lion. The lion later appears to Shasta, who then understands that the lion is Aslan (a representation of Christ in the stories). Aslan explains to Shasta that he has been with him all along. Shasta asks about Aravis:
“Then it was you who wounded Aravis?”
“It was I.”
“But what for?”
“Child,” said the Voice, “I am telling you your story, not hers. I tell no one any story but his own.”
We don’t know why God “wounded” Charlotte. My prayer is that He will reveal His reasons to her as she grows up, and that she will share her story with others. I know that we have been sharing this side of the story with you all, but I know that what we have seen so far is just the back cover of the book. There is so much more to come…
“You intended to harm me, but God intended it for good to accomplish what is now being done, the saving of many lives.” Genesis 50:20